his return, part 2.

i hadn't seen him in months but he looked
as handsome as the day i met him
my junior year in highschool. and we gave
each other the obligatory side hug
the one you use with ex-lovers
when i came down stairs, and i sat down at the table and
proceeded to eat my weight in ham.

his green eyes pierced into mine
and i asked him to pass the cranberry sauce
and he obliged. and held my hand. and i just
sat there, looking stupid, missing him
missing us
even though he was three feet to my left.

i went upstairs to take my post grubbage siesta
and he came into my room and sat
on the side of my bed and we
made small talk and he mentioned how he wanted
to straighten his curly mane and i was like yo,
i have a chi flat iron. let's get it.

so with a pink chi in my hand and
220 pounds of ex-boyfriend leaning on me
i proceeded to straighten his locks, sizzling
making him look like one of prince's backup singers.
oddly androgynous. it was a terribly funny idea.

and while i was chi-ing, i dont even think thats a word,
we talked about everything that used to be
and i felt his shoulders relax their tension
and his head leaned against my chest as i attempted
to straighten his back.

45 minutes later he looked like a lebanese lion.
and i don't think i have laughed that hard in years
he was horrified but thought it was funny all the same.
he tickled me, put the chi down and kissed me on my
forehead on my
cheeks on my
lips and held me like he used to
before 300 miles got in between
the only love i could ever attest to.
and it was like nothing had changed. i was still
17 and a cheerleader and he was still 17 and
playing football and we had all the time
to figure out the rest of our lives.
together.

i started to cry and i'm not really sure if its
because i missed him or
i missed us or i missed
home or i missed feeling loved
but in his arms
i could have been in a middle of a monsoon
the eye of a hurricane in the
path of a tornado because i hadn't
felt that safe
in such a long time.

damn.