the future freaks me out.

if i could wear what i wanted to an interview,
i would wear my favorite magenta leggings,
my blue bonnet my favorite bright ass
paisley forever 21 print top and some
ripped jeans. and my big red purse.

but instead

i'm sitting here this itchy black suit
starched white collar that took me
30 minutes to steam iron correctly
pointed toe heels that i keep rolling
my ankle under in and a smedium
wristlet that holds virtually, nothing.
but it's alright
because in the future
this is what i,
a successful lawyer,
will wear.

so at my interview
for a prestigious atlanta law firm
trying to get an internship this summer
i put on my best please-take-me-seriously
i'm-n0t-just-another-little-colored-girl
-i-go-to-vanderbilt-and-i-can-write-my-ass-off
about-anything-and-i-work-well-with-people
and-i-type-quicker-than-mavis-beacon-so
please-please-pick-me smile.

and she asks me
why i want to be a lawyer.
and thinking about it now
hours later
i could have said all kinds of impressive shit
that would have made her book my flight
delta, first class, for atlanta, georgia
but instead, i said,

i want to change the world.

it was the only thing
on my blissfully honest mind.

she studied my earnest face, smiled,
widely,
and said,
me too.
and proceeded with the interview.

i walked out
into the chill midwestern air
pigeoned toed, because i hate these damn shoes
fell into my car
drove home
and started looking for
summer apartment leases
available in atlanta