30 / 30 : ecclesiastes 9:11.

last poem of the month.

it's been crazy, crazy crazy.

thank you for reading. ive enjoyed the criticism and encouragement.

start your own. keep writing. and reading.

everyone's a poet.

ecclesiastes 9:11

i woke up this morning 

for the first time in four months

without my mother down the hall

to the sound of an incoming message

to my phone

i lazily rolled over 

in my freshly washed linen

in my freshly cleaned room

to a text from her that

declared

the race goes not to the swift

nor the strong

but he who endureth 

in the end

ecclesiastes 9:11

right now i'm in the race for my life

to make sure my future fits 

securely in my palm and snug

in my pocket 

pressed and panicked

each stroke of the clock would set me

off 

but reading that

from the wisest woman that i know

made me smile and i slowly

relaxed

fell back asleep

F.I.L.A.

in atlantaaaaaa. amazingness to the utmost extremest powerrrrr.

F.I.L.A.

we memphians have been raised

to hate on atlanta

out of principle

no real reason of merit

and i had never been

due to that fact until

my twenty first year

and now that i'm here im

in love with the sprawling city

with the district im in

with its quirky stores and

mom and pop coffee shops

with hipsters and gangsters

intermingling on the same curb

waiting for the crosswalk to suggest

that they walk across the street

together

and despite the marta madness

and the other glaring flaws something

makes this city larger than life

i know how long i'm going

to stay

but how long will

other obligations keep me away?

25 / 30 : a dream deferred.

soc 201 final today.

.............................................

so tonight must be legendary, to make up for such occurrences. 

a dream deferred

despite the fact that i let

the idea of you and me fall to

the waist side i cant help

that at night you slip and slither

your way into my REM cycle

electrifying my neurological motor board

with a touch that feels as real as 

it used to be back in the day and

i've missed a few phonecalls and

appointments and probably a few classes

because any dream with you in it is so

tantalizing

my body can't seem to and

doesn't want to tear itself away

from being wrapped up in your

subliminal embrace because once

the tone from my shrill alarm clock

is heard you and i

are nothing more than

a dream deferred

9 / 30 : girltalk.

whoooa yes lord. got a perm today so im feeling fierce. but its supposed to rain tomorrow :( but its going to be a good weekend. my mommy is coming down and what not.

andddddd [drumroll]

in the new president of vanderbilt spoken word!!!!! a weekend to celebrate. 

but before then....a poem! 

as usual, nate prolly got off his ass and wrote a poem here. and u can be sure that there are dope poems on the 3030 cypher here. 

girltalk

girl, don't you know that

i've been in your shoes before

thought the same thoughts talked

the same talk negativity oozing

out of my pores and bitterness

tearing away at my humanity

sitting here looking at you is like

looking back at me mirror image

of who i used to be but i refuse

to let anyone tell me to stifle my swag

and modify my destiny

and i wont let them tell you that either

girl, the tears that have dropped down your face

are identical to my own and

i've felt the doubt that you feel when

you walk into a room 

and when the paranoia that they are talking

about you heads your way

turn your pretty head girl

don't let them ruin your day

because i let it ruin months and months

and ate me inside out

if i could turn back the hands of time

there would be no doubt

my attitude would change and my swag

would have never faltered

and when i see someone like you

being hurt like someone like me

i cant help but be bothered

you are beautiful beyond belief

and you have an unconquerable soul

your wisdom is beyond your years

and you'll conquer all of your fears

in due time

but for right now let this marinate

and i know it will hurt to do

but by the end of the road

when you turn and look back 

you'll see that letting the anger brew

would do nothing at all

so if you can bear witness to your enemies

look them in the face and stand tall

trust me when i say, 

girl, one day 

you'll have 

it all

the future freaks me out.

if i could wear what i wanted to an interview,
i would wear my favorite magenta leggings,
my blue bonnet my favorite bright ass
paisley forever 21 print top and some
ripped jeans. and my big red purse.

but instead

i'm sitting here this itchy black suit
starched white collar that took me
30 minutes to steam iron correctly
pointed toe heels that i keep rolling
my ankle under in and a smedium
wristlet that holds virtually, nothing.
but it's alright
because in the future
this is what i,
a successful lawyer,
will wear.

so at my interview
for a prestigious atlanta law firm
trying to get an internship this summer
i put on my best please-take-me-seriously
i'm-n0t-just-another-little-colored-girl
-i-go-to-vanderbilt-and-i-can-write-my-ass-off
about-anything-and-i-work-well-with-people
and-i-type-quicker-than-mavis-beacon-so
please-please-pick-me smile.

and she asks me
why i want to be a lawyer.
and thinking about it now
hours later
i could have said all kinds of impressive shit
that would have made her book my flight
delta, first class, for atlanta, georgia
but instead, i said,

i want to change the world.

it was the only thing
on my blissfully honest mind.

she studied my earnest face, smiled,
widely,
and said,
me too.
and proceeded with the interview.

i walked out
into the chill midwestern air
pigeoned toed, because i hate these damn shoes
fell into my car
drove home
and started looking for
summer apartment leases
available in atlanta